my boyfriend always thinks I'm cheating on him

please help. I love my boyfriend very much, we have been together for over a year now and have been living together for 5 months. for our entire relationship he has accused me of cheating on him. he sometimes ask me if I'm cheating on him several times a day.

I have been cheated on and know how bad it hurts and I've never cheated on anyone before, I never would. I've tried constantly reassuring him sharing my computer passwords with him and calling and texting him several times a day to tell him much I love him and care about him.

Still though he constantly questions me about everything I do from what I eat to how I dress to the music I listen to and who I'm talking to when and what I said. nothing has helped.

His constant questioning in last of trust in me makes me cry all the time. he says the fact that I cry and argue with him let him know that I'm cheating on him, I think I'm beginning to give up hope.

I'm not a cheater and I'm not a bad person but being treated like one every day is destroying me. What can I do?

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Sometimes i ask myself, what really make those who claim to love you stay ? Is it the feel of protection, or the feeling that their money is enough to make someone endure their presence until it all blows away or the feeling of love, or is it all these wrapped in one big gift bag? I never got to know the answer to my question and i may never get the answer. You see, i had money or rather i can say i had enough to care for my ex wife now and my two kids and heaven know i gave my wife then all the love she needed from me in every way i can imagine or possibly give love. I gave my family protection, love and everything one can ever ask for in one big gift bag. Now speaking of my ex wife, i did the impossible to see she was happy all the time because i loved her so much that seeing her happy really makes me happy. But it seems to my ex wife money and the good life was everything and love, was nothing but an illusion. Some how in a way one thing leading to another i lost my job at J.P Morgan as an accountant and just like that my beautiful world of colors as i knew it, came down crashing on me. Being not in my youth and vibrant age it was so impossible to get a new job. No one wanted to heir someone like me i mean if it were me, i sure as he** wouldn't heir me. They all needed a fresh young and updated version of me. After six months my bills started pilling up i was so late on my mortgage and every hard thing that happens when someone losses his job just as a finger snap was happening to me. My wife being my wife saw this and thought there was no way out and then she felt me filed for a divorce and wanted to take all i had left. The one thing that kept me from breaking just as i watched my life come to end. She wanted to take my girls from me and have them rised by her lover. This will be a very long tale if i start on how she got herself a new man off course with money and managed to make him fall for her just as i did so i will just skip that part. The fight for custody went on and i was going to loss in all ways because i had just lost my job and house was gone and i was diagnosed to be emotionally unstable. By some cosmic accident that i don't even believe in, i found a witch doctor named Mutton Osun on the internet who out of desperation i contacted for help and somehow placed all my hope on and heave bless him, he lived up to his words. I poured on him my sorrows,I told him how i lost my job ,my wife and how i was about to lose my girls and he listened and comforted me via telephone. Speaking to Mutton Osun healed my heart and gave me hope again. Mutton Osun is a rear gem that can not be easily found. I wanted him to help me get back my job and win my girls custody battle. He asked me to get some materials which was going to be used to get a spell done to grant my request. I gave him the money to get the materials for me because it saved me a lot of expenses. After four day he sent me a package asking that i follow the instruction he left along with the package. I did all he asked of me and like a miracle i was called back to my job at J .P Morgan with them saying i have been given a second chance after six month? and just after the spell? it only explained on thing that the spell is at work and i won the custody case of my girls just as i asked. I should have asked for my wife back but no she caused me so much pain and every bit of love for her ,was dead. You reading should not just believe me. Contact Mutton Osun let him help you and your problem them you will believe all this is as real as it gets. Use this as contact godsofosunx @ roc ket mail. com
note: roc ket mail. com is joined together like every other email format

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There is only so much you can do. You already share your devices openly and make enough contact and verbal reassurance. I think he either needs to trust you, or you need to find someone who will. If you do not give him a reason to distrust you, he has issues he needs to deal with by himself.

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I know ow you fell my boyfriends say way and i have never cheated on him. closed my facebook account and made one with us together, ive done everything i can to show him and theres always something, cause i didnt answer phone or call back till like hour later im with someone else. it hurts me bad and to a point where im hateful. how can we make them see we love them and dont want anyone else. i couldnt deal with 2 lol

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hello everyone am here to share my testimony on how i got my marriage back on track, i got married 7 years ago and everything was going well and we where happy because i love my husband so much and he love me too, we had two kids, fews weeks ago i notices change in my husband behavior coming home late at night i thought it was just because of meetings in the office but it get worse then i decided to ask him, he just go away from me and past 4 night out side i was confuse i called him on phone but refuse to pick up my call he came back the 5th night and told me he want divorce i was surprise i thought it was a joke i beg him to stop later i new he had a girl friend outside i did all i could to get him back but all avail, one day i was searching the Internet on advice to get my husband back i saw a testimony on how Dr ogudugu help a lady got her husband back i said let me try, i contact him also with his email address and told him what am going through and he promise to help me and he help me and i did what he ask me to do after 3 days my husband came back home and went down on his kneels and be begging me to forgive him and that he don't know what came over him, i was so happy and i thank dr ogudugu for bring my marriage back on track, if you have the same problem or similar one just contact dr ogudugu now and get your prayer answer contact him with his email address [email protected] and be happy like me

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Hello i am Gavin Danielle from UK I'm here to give testimony of how i got back my husband, we got married for more than 7 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted great Dr Ogba for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, He castled the spell and after 2days my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologize on phone and said that he still live me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that the great Dr Ogba castled on him that make him comeback to me today,me and my family are now happy again together . thank you great Dr Ogba for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact great Dr Ogba on his mail [email protected] or call +2348116144331 and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay..

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Hello i am Gavin Danielle from UK I'm here to give testimony of how i got back my husband, we got married for more than 7 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted great Dr Ogba for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, He castled the spell and after 2days my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologize on phone and said that he still live me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that the great Dr Ogba castled on him that make him comeback to me today,me and my family are now happy again together . thank you great Dr Ogba for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact great Dr Ogba on his mail [email protected] or call +2348116144331 and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay..

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Often the reason people accuse you of cheating on them is a cover that they are actually cheating themselves on you, its a weird psychology they have, because if you ever found out he was cheating on you his reply will be 'I did it because I thought you were cheating on me'
I'd certainly keep an eye on his activities. There are some products you can buy to detect semen in underware. He sounds like a control freak and obviously you're not happy, so if you're not happy end it sooner than later. It may be hard to hear but it is the best option for you. And, there is a possibility he is cheating on you. I did a lot of reading and research on the subject of 'cheating partners' on classic signs of cheating and that is one of them, as I've had it done to me with a few women.

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are you still together?

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Stop texts nd calls to him...finally one day he will come to u to check u...that day make situation that ur in sucide attempt....and write a note explaining exactly how u felt "its harder to live destroying me every day with accusing person"......then after he nvr question u again.....if reailse then gud fr both..if nt jus waiting for his realisatn is only thng left with u......and dnt frgt to chk him if he already in a reltn

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Has he ever cheated on you or cheated on his previous girlfriends? You may want to find out. That would explain his behavior clearly.

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If he doesn't trust you by now he never will. You can't be happy in a relationship without trust. Leave and never look back when a guy acts like that so soon after moving in they become more controlling and then get violent I have seen it happen and it's always the same. You deserve better than that and shouldn't put up with anyone treating you badly.

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Hi Blissless
I am a domestic violence specialist.
That sounds really tough and must make you feel so frustrated. This does sound like abusive controlling behaviour. And I would invite you to maybe seek some professional advice about domestic abuse in case this is what you are going through.
Excessive jealousy and watching the pain he is causing but not doing anything to account for his behaviour is a warning sign. Just be careful and see if any professional organisation around domestic abuse can offer some information and advice. wish you all the best,

Rosie
www. healingafterabuse .co.uk

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hi

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If he hasn't learnt to trust you in the time you have been together, then he is never going to trust you. Your relationship will always be this way and possibly even get worse - this is a form of control and could very easily lead to mental abuse. This guy is controlling you - he knows every move you make, who you see, what you listen to, where you go.. this is NOT a healthy relationship. You should have the freedom to be yourself, go where you want and see who you want and not come home to questioning. He should be making you laugh and smile every day, not bring you to tears. This guy has some major issues that he needs to sort out for himself - this is NOT anything to do with you and it's not your fault, but he needs to sort his sh*t out. You need to be strong, by giving in to him you are giving him control over you and you are letting him tear you down. You deserve the right to your privacy. I would slowly start taking some control back - when his questioning gets out of control or he's accusing you of cheating, just walk away. Don't let him treat you like that. Sit him down and tell him straight out that he has a choice - he can learn to trust you because you are doing nothing wrong, or he can leave, but you will not put up with the way he treats you. The walk away. If he can't accept your right to privacy and learn to trust and be a true bf, then you are so much better without him.

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i read your post and am really sorry you are going through this. You've let him realize you cant cheat on him yet he still cant stop believing you, i wouldn't conclude he doesn't believe you. he might just bee pretending. I believe you would have sit him down times without number to convince him. Now is the time to make correction to your problem. Just be yourself. You could also get good facts from this link www.thedatinghow.com/melt-his-heart.html
i hope this helps

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I'm in the same exact possiton too. It sucks, my boyfriend is graduating 2 years before me and he is always saying how i cheat on him and im gonna do it when he leaves. I love him like crazy and it hurts knowing h thinks im that kind of person. I dated this one guy and he cheated on me 8 times. so I know the pain of it and would never put anyone i love through that. Be strong though. They have the Maury show. I dont know if you heard of it before but it is a great way to prove to him that you dont cheat. I havent gone on the show. But ive seen it enough to know it works.

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Im in the same boat, my boyfriend has had an open relationship with his ex but then she took it to the extreme and started cheating heavily on him. Now I am in this with him, and for the first 7 months all I heard was how wonderful I was how much he loved me and cherished me and now it is constant you have a boyfriend, are you looking for a boyfriend you are cheating on me I am not enough or attractive for you are you looking, you are cheating you are just pretending, I am hearing that more than I am hearing I love you, I truly love you, I have never loved anyone like I love you, I love you so much I can't stand it. I have been cheated on and I would never do that to another person. I have been told by my ex that I never loved you for almost our entire relationship, I have been just pretending and faking I don't respect you you are just an embarrassment and frustration. I am so confused myself cause I was so beat down and made to feel so inferior that this new relationship with what he told me for the time he was flirting with me and then the first 7 months of our relationship it was amazing to be told and shown that you are so cherished - then to have that end and just be mostly accused of this hurts. I tried to tell my boyfriend I miss those first months where he would shower me with words and touches and kisses and tell me how important I was to him, he scoffed at me and say Oh come on you can't stay in the same place you evolve" What he doesn't understand and will listen to is that all his constant telling me he is inferior and that I am looking elsewhere and accusing me of looking for a boyfriend has destroyed my trust and confidence in our relationship. He won't listen I feel for you, it is hard

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Usually the one accusing the other of cheating is the one cheating. He has your passwords, wants to know who you've talked to and about what? He wants to know what you're wearing? These are all red flags, he will only get worse he has no self esteem or trusting bone in his body. You've been with him 8 months next it will turn into violence, cut your loses now get what you can of your stuff out of there while he is at work then once that's done and leaves for work again run just as far as you can and don't look back, got to your court house and file a VPO against him he sounds just crazy enough to try to harm you so stay with friends or family for awhile, your life just might depend on it. Good luck and God bless you

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This guy is cheating on you. Get out now. They get more and more abusive. I had one of these. He almost killed me. They only accuse you to keep you so occupied by defending yourself, you can't see what THEY are doing. It was the worst year of my life. It cost me financially for five years after he left me, moved out, stole everything and moved in with the girl he was cheating on me with. RUN FOR THE HILLS, ANY GIRL READING THIS. GET OUT NOW!!!! No man who is faithful and respects you accuses you of things you haven't done. REMEMBER ladies, NO ONE will respect you until you respect yourself, best advice I ever received.

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I am really sorry you experienced an abusive partner.

I am glad you are out - if you ever need to chat and have some emotional support around this experience if you suffer with hurtful memories, low self-esteem, anxiety etc, please feel free to contact our service -

Rosie
www. healingafterabuse .co.uk

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^THIS

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I agree with everything you said.

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I saw this post pop up on my news feed on facebook the other day. This post is 4 months old, but lots of people left me helpful advice (and a few some not so helpful advice). Thank you to everyone who encouraged me to leave, I actually left him two weeks after I made this post when the emotional manipulation turned to physical violence. I never thought I would be the type of girl to end up in an abusive relationship, when he hit me, it was easy to identify as abuse. It was not so easy to see that the accusations, putting me down, telling me I wasn't good enough all the time, were abuse too. He just told me he was a really honest person and wouldn't tell me these things if he didn't love me, and only wanted to know everything about me, but that was a lie, even if he was lying to himself.

We went to two therapy sessions together after I posted this, and he became very heated and threatened the counselor when she said the situation made her uncomfortable and perhaps if I "did nothing at all that ever made him feel loved" that he should leave me. He just wanted her to convince me I was crazy and a bad girlfriend for failing to make him feel secure. She refused to see us again, citing that he made her uncomfortable. This made me realize he was not only abusive to me, he had an abusive personality.

I won't go more into that, but 4 months later I am doing great. I am proud that I got up and walked away from a bad situation. I cut off all contact with him. I am now back in grad school, something he had told me might be a "bad idea" because I wouldn't have enough time for our relationship. I'm able to concentrate better and am doing better at work because I do not have to check in 30 times a day and actually sleep through the night. My relationships with my family and friends have improved dramatically and I am now seeing a sweet, caring, wonderful man. He is very supportive and tells me every day how lucky he is to have me. I now know that THIS is what love feels like, and it does not hurt.

Many people suggested I was being cheated on, maybe I was, I'll never know. Some people suggested I stop cheating. You might as well tell pigs not to fly. No one can stop doing something they've never done. Many people suggested I run, and this post is for all of you who did. Thank You. I did run, and if anyone else in this situation is reading this, RUN! This is not what love feels like.

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Awwh :) Good on you! I'm glad you're doing so much better for yourself. :)

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Glad to hear it! You're one of the lucky ones.

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im happy for you =)

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congratulations for getting away and being happier from it :)

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Congrats!

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wanna know my advice?????? Say to him "Trust me, or leave me" .... I know you will feel very broken if you love him so much, but i give you choice , stay like that and let him destroy you, or leave him , even you are broken alot, at least its not everyday, because one day later you will find someone way better

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in my experience, (and trust me, i have been there more than once), he sees guys look at you and is insecure about himself. he is scared to lose you. giving your passwords and calling him constantly just gives him control, and there will come a day when you want control of your own life. you can't be babysitting him and his irrational fears all the time, its draining and takes a piece of you. one of two things is happening, either 1. he feels guilty for something he has done. or, and more likely, 2. he is insecure and nothing you do or say will get through to him, because its not YOU thats the problem, its him. he needs to get help, seek counselling or something. because that sounds very controlling and in my experience leads to abusive, angry behavior. and by then you're all in, stuck and attached. and i don't want to see that happen to anyone. if he doesn't trust you, there is no pillars for the relationship to stand on. and if you have done nothing to make him distrust you then he needs to seek help for his issues, because its obviously something underlying that you cannot fix for him. if you care, tell him in a nice way he needs to get help, because if not you two aren't going to make it.. not in a healthy/happy way atleast. i hope that helps. good luck hun.

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Honey it's too close for you to see that he is one cheating.

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I know the popular response is the "he is propably cheating". But IMO he is being abusive. This is one of the first steps an abuser uses to gain control and it's worked! Look, he has ALL your passwords and he has you checking in with him constantly!!! This is NOT a healthy relationship. When one person gives over the control to the relationship, it will NEVER work out. It will just keep escalating. I have BTDT. You need to think things through and decide what kind of relationship you want. Then sit down with your BF and let him know your expeditions. CHANGE all your passwords and DON'T check in. If he can't handle that, he needs some serious help. I recommend therapy any way. I can predict his reaction. He will either blame YOU for his insecurities or will cry and say you don't love him.
My relationship with with my husband is equal. We talk and tell each other about our day. I do not "check in with him". He does NOT have my passwords to ANYTHING. Its called respect. Demand YOURS!

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This is also very true ether way she needs to get out!

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Ok, after reading such details and what not.

Chances are it might be him that's cheating. But that's been said already. The real questions here is, why might he think you be cheating so much? Do you have far too many single male "friends" that you talk to on a daily basis when you aren't talking to your boyfriend? Being that he has your passwords and what not is a good thing, it shows you don't have anything to hide, but might it be some people you talk to that he don't know? Maybe you might be getting a little more dolled up than usual and not really noticing?

My advice, pay close attention to what you do, that's exactly what your boyfriend is doing. What you might consider harmless to you, he doesn't think so. That might be the solution to your problem here. Either that or get the for certain solution and you both get a lie detector test asking the following question.

1. While in a relationship with (Your name/His name), have you had any type of sexual relationship with any other male or female?

That is all.

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I would remove the word Dr. from your name, your advice is hardly professional...She obviously is so enamored with him, I doubt she is leading him on to believe she is cheating. That is what folks are going by. I know you want to play devils advocate, but it is clear as day there is just blatant abuse here. Regardless of what is really going on.

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this guy sounds like he is sick in the head. Slave is right. Move out change your number and passwords and passwords to emails computer whatever he knows. Security answers and if that doesn't stop him from bothering you restraining order his a*s. He is dangerous. Have you ever watched the show "Snapped" or "Fatal Vows" he has all the signs leave before it's too late

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this guy sounds like a insecure control freak. if he always thinks you cheating he doesn't trust you and probably never will. you shouldn't share your passwords it's your facebook or whatever. he wants you do what he says and when he says, he wants you to be like slave.

you should end things with this guy. it's probably never going to get better.

you're a good person, find someone who will treat you like it.

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Bayeck i couldn't agree more

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i totally agree!

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Usually if they are constantly accusing you of cheating, then THEY are the ones cheating. I was in a relationship like that before. My ex fiance was always accusing me of cheating. His was self esteem issues, but he had me beaten down so emotionally and mentally, that I stayed...until he started drinking more and became violent. Next time he asks you if you are cheating on him, try to dig deeper and get inside his head. Find out WHY he thinks that, what proof he thinks he has..If he skirts having that conversation with you, ask him who HE'S cheating on YOU with..make sure to watch his face closely for reactions.

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Exactly i had this exact thing happen with my exboyfreind. I say he's the cheater get out now while u still can girl

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yep

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