It’s breaking my heart, should I wait for him to realize what he wants?

HomeCategory: BreakupsIt’s breaking my heart, should I wait for him to realize what he wants?
savannahxx29 asked 6 years ago

My now ex boyfriend and I have been broken up for over a week, after dating for a year and a half. He broke up with me because he felt like we were getting too serious, and that he wanted to experience single life and have freedom from me. Also, in two weeks, I’ll be going back to college which is far enough away that I can only drive home to see him on Friday nights and Saturdays, which makes it difficult to have a relationship right now. Around the same time, he will be starting his classes here, as well as he recently picked up drumming for a band and being on a golf team. So we will both be really busy. We went through the same thing last year though, and made it through. The night before last, I had went to his house with no other intention than to quickly pick up the stuff I had left there, and to walk out without within 10 minutes. After he asked me to stay, I ended up being there for 4 hours with him still asking me to stay longer, along with him texting me when I got home. During those four hours, he flirted with me, kissed me, everything. The day after that, he called around 2:00 pm and after some general conversation, said he didn’t really have a reason for calling other than that he was near my house, about to go to golf, and wanted to stop by and get a water bottle for the way there since he was out of them at his house. He came over for about half an hour, and as I walked around the kitchen, he would put his hands on me, hug me, kiss me…and before he left he asked me to hang out later that night. So around 7 he called and asked me to go to eat. During that, he asked me to go somewhere with him this coming weekend. After dinner, we went to the boat docks and sat and talked and he fished for a few hours. He said things like that he was confused, and didn’t want the relationship we had, but that he missed me and enjoyed spending time with me. He also mentioned a few times that he didn’t want to give me hope that we would ever get back together. But on the other hand, he said me going back to college made him want to be with me again because he’s afraid I’ll find someone else, and that he still planned to keep me in his life for a while. I spent several more hours at his house (left at midnight) and we ended up laying on the couch talking again. He said something to the effect of that he couldnt say he loved me anymore. He also said that he’s been kind of talking to other girls, but had no intention of getting in another relationship. I asked when he would be ready to let me go, and he said something like “We are laying on the couch together, I think we can both see where this is going” along with “I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to say good bye until we’re 80 years old and it’s the final one.” I ended up leaving before I said I would, and he asked me to stay longer again, even though I didn’t. Before I left, he said he loved me, and then quickly apologized after and said he didnt mean to say it. I can’t tell what he wants. It seems like he’s so confused to me, which I understand and I wanted to give him time to figure it out, but he can’t keep me from moving on if he’s going to. He’d say stuff that made me feel like he wanted to be in a relationship again, and then turn around and say something that made it seem like a relationship would be the worst thing. I mean, if he doesn’t want a relationship with me, why is he acting the way he is?