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all alone, heartbroken girl. with no friends :(

HomeCategory: Breakupsall alone, heartbroken girl. with no friends :(
laura_h_x asked 5 years ago

hey all, i am wondering if any of yous can help me with a little thing.

me and this lad were seening each for 1 year and 6 months, at the start it was the best time in my life, we couldnt be more in love. but i know i had to tell him about my past and i was unsure how he would take it as i was forced to do things that i didnt want to do. he made me forget about everything what happened, didnt get me to explian more about it. The last couple of weeks that person who forced me to do stuff is trying to get back in contact with him. 

The boyfriend wanted me to take him to meet that person but i refused and boyfriend thinks i got feelings for the person who forced me or is protecting him, but i dont want nothing to do with that person. boyfriend left it there then couple of days brought it up again and we had a big argument, he phoned his mam up and told her to come and get him. His mam phone me to tell me i need to sort my head out and to see what was going on and i froze as i didnt want to tell her about my past as didnt want her to think bad of me. me and boyfriend spoke and sorted it out. 

the next time i saw his mam face to face, she realise something was up and i told her everything about my past and broke down. i told her, your son is the best thing that happened to me and i am in love with him. but i am not letting your son and that person to meet as he is my past and your son is my future.

the next couple of months i found out the pill never work and i was pregnant and he was at work, so i had to wait until he was finished. i didnt know how to tell him so i froze on the phone and he guess so he came around mine the next day and we decide to have a big think about it, but in that time, everyone found out about it and i was getting judge. i felt alone as my supposed called friends stopped talking to me as was thinking of getting rid of it but they didnt know what i have to lose. the next week or so went in a blurr, wasnt pay attention in class, was going in moods and was getting called names and having sly comments. but i lost it due to stress 🙁 we started to get back to normal but wasnt have it felt like before. (it felt like abit of me was lost)

but the last couple of weeks, they are email (off my account – that i havent used for ages) going around saying i have been message other people on that account, cheating on him, i was pregnant with him. he knew my hotmail account password and went on it and he thinks its me who sent it as it say sent by blackberry. (i havent used that email in ages, plus my phone was damaged in that time scald and wouldnt switch on)

i know someone hacked on my account and i know who as it the person who is from my past, he made the person i was seeing think it was me. he told some people what happened to me in the past but i dont want people to feel sorry about me or anything like that. 

sadly with everything we been thought it ended! i have tried to froget about him and cant. i went away for a week to see if that helps but it didnt. i dont feel myself, i am not my normal self no more, i dont know what to do? 

my friends still not talking to me, my mam thinks i am being daft and need to grow up. 🙁 the worst of the day is night times thats when it hits my the wost :'( 

what can i do? how do i forget my ex? how can i make him realize it not me who sent them emails? when will friends realise i lost it due to stress?