I’ve broken the no contact rule and she dumped me again. Need help please

HomeCategory: BreakupsI’ve broken the no contact rule and she dumped me again. Need help please
oklm asked 2 years ago

Basically my gf dumped me cos she was all the time feeling insecure n jaleous and kept accusing me of cheating. Then I started the NC and it was working perfectly, one week after (yesterday) she contacted my friend cos she needed me to get my stuffs at hers, when my friend called me I called her straight away and then she convinced me by crying and everything. I think that’s where I failed by letting my emotions lead me and then I started telling her how I love her and I would like to fix everything, didn’t blame here and both of us were very happy. This morning she rang me and asked me to come and get my stuffs. Didn’t understand nothing. Does the NC could still helps me? Help me please it hurts so much. Thanks for ur comments.

5 Answers
oliverjones answered 2 years ago

I don’t understand the question

oklm answered 2 years ago

Actually after the break up I applied the NC rule and it worked properly but I called her after 1 week (initially for 2 or 3 weeks) and then she dumped me again.

oliverjones answered 2 years ago

If move on and find someone who appreciates you.

Reynolds answered 2 years ago

Its better to move on.

Evolzippo answered 2 years ago

It sounds to me like you are stuck in the “bargaining phase” of your grief process. Which is actually a good sign of progress for your emotional recovery. 
One thing worth noting, is that it sounds like if you follow some kind of no-contact rule, it’ll make her miss you, and that will bring her back.
I have felt the kind of despair you are going through. Just know that if there were any chance of working things out, she knows you want to. She’s well informed of your hope for resolution.
One fact that really needs to be faced, is that if you two were really compatible, you’d still be together. It’s likely that you really were at some point, but grew apart. There’s no going back.
This won’t always hurt this bad. Your heart will heal. Just focus on mourning this loss. Don’t worry about anything but letting your sadness work it’s way out. It’ll feel like it’s going to take longer than it really will. But don’t try to speed-grieve. Our emotions don’t work that way
And that’s the best advice I can give.

oklm replied 2 years ago

Evolzippo thanks for ur advice.
There’s a lot of things happened since but as I was on shock mode didn’t bother to reply.
Basically for 3 weeks ago I ran into her in a night club in my city (she lives 7miles away to my city) I think she’s trying to make me jealous cos she knew she gonna see me in this club, when I got into the club I saw her n her mate then I panicked (can’t explain it, I felt like a storm in my heart) and stayed about 1m staring at her and her so, after this break time I decided to talk to her and she went cold and nasty. I started saying “hi u ok?” and one bloke (her new bf) came over and talk to her about 3m then left, and she started chasing me even though I didn’t say anything at all, she just said “go away” and her mate pushed me, I didn’t say nothing and left, I could see clearly that she moved on. The next Saturday she came again to the same club but I stopped going there as I know she will come there with her new bf but unfortunately my mates keep killing me with every single details about my ex, I’ve been told that she came with an other bloke and left around 6am, Now it’s been 19 days now I stopped any contact with her and I’m trying to get over her even though it’s rough. The thing is I’m so hurt and can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve been in 3 dates but I don’t really feel it as I’m just thinking about my ex when I’m with any girl, all those good memories are driving me mad and mad. I don’t know what do to get over her as I’ve got a beautiful and good girl who’s deeply in love with me but I still got strong feelings for my ex and don’t want to break her heart if my ex decide to come back.
I’m confused now as I don’t know if I have to leave my new date and wait for my ex to cool down and come back or move on my ex and start a new relationship. My new date is gorgeous and clever, I prefer my ex gf but don’t really want to wait for someone who doesn’t love me anymore, I don’t know if my ex still love me cos if she does I need to give her space and time to cool down but if she doesn’t I’ll wait for nothing so please I’m confused, can someone analyse and help me… thanks

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