Cheater or not a cheater? Get back together or stay?

HomeCategory: CheatingCheater or not a cheater? Get back together or stay?
Mehouter74 asked 2 years ago

When my boyfriend and I first met, he was dating another girl. He eventually started telling me he broke up with her (which he actually didn’t) and we started hanging out more. One day, he told me that he actually broke up with his girlfriend of a year (for real this time) and we started dating.

She was very rude to me when he and i first became friends (understandably so)

Therefore, I wasn’t much of a fan of hers either. Occasionally, he would bring his ex-girlfriend up and i would get extremely upset. I asked him multiple times: I don’t want to hear about her, I don’t want you talking to her, but if she tries to contact you, I want to know about it. He agreed and told me he blocked her number, but he still occasionally would bring her up.

Fast forward 6 months:
The other day, we had made plans for me to pick him up from his home after I got off of work. Midday, he texted me and said we’d have to hang out later because he had to help his grandma. Around 6pm, I texted him again. A lot. He finally answered and told me he was sleeping. I knew this was not true. I asked him if i could stop by for cough medicine and he absolutely refused. He finally (around 8pm) admitted to being “forced” to go with his older brother somewhere (which has never happened before). He has been acting a little strange recently, so, being the overthinking woman I am, I asked him if he was cheating on me. He denied it, of course, and sent me this long text message about how I’m the only one for him and blah blah blah. He then admitted that he had a surprise for me. He then admitted it was a tattoo that he was getting and sent me a snapchat of it. I recognized the tattoo shop. Then, unbeknownst to him, I showed up at the tattoo shop… and who did i see in the window holding his hand as he was getting his tattoo? His ex-girlfriend. I got extremely upset and broke up with him and told him I never wanted to talk to him again and that his stuff will be outside.

Later than night, I saw him show up at my home and brought his ex-girlfriend with him up to my front porch to get his stuff.

The next day, he told me he wanted to “just talk”. Trying to handle the situation maturely, I told him we could. He admitted that he had been texting her on and off for the past 3 weeks just as friends and he only hung out with her once before about 3 weeks ago. His exact words were “I always made sure we hung out in a public place and she knew you and I were dating. I have no feelings for her. She was just a ride to go get my tattoo.” He apologized and swore that they were just friends, but I keep thinking that if I hadn’t caught him, I would have never known any of this.