I made friends with a guy from work a few months ago. I think he fancies me, and has said several explicit things to me, in person, by text and online like (paraphrasing as best as I can):
“Can we **** please?”
“Send me a pic of your tits”
“You probably have a nice tight p***y”
“I really wanna lick you out”
“You have lovely boobs”
“I want to smash your front and back doors in”
And lots more. He does also call me beautiful sometimes, but I feel like that’s overridden by all the other lewd comments he makes.
I liked him as a friend, but I can’t fancy him when he keeps speaking to me like that. He’s seems way too sex-mad for me, and I worry he doesn’t see me as much more than a sex object. It’s also overwhelming as he’s the first guy to act that way towards me.
I don’t need a guy to treat me like that, being all sex mad in order to get me to fancy him; just being a generally friendly and interesting person with plenty of decent conversation will do.
Is this unusual for me to feel like this? Am I possibly at all demisexual, have a low sex drive, or just prefer a personality and romance rather than just sex?
By the way, I’m a virgin as I just haven’t found the right guy yet, and this guy certainly won’t be it.
This guy is a creep, plain and simple. Yes, it’s completely normal to be turned off by unwanted attention such as this.
In fact, you have the legal right to tell him to stop talking to you that way. Just inform him that sexual harassment is a crime, so you are giving him one chance to either stop talking to you that way, or stop talking to you at all.
I would inform your boss of how he’s been acting, and tell them you’ll try to handle it yourself. Do it before you talk to him, because if he tries to retaliate, or starts trying to get you in trouble, they’ll know his real motive instead of what ever bogus story he comes up with.
If he flat out refuses to back off, your boss is obligated to fire him. If it gets bad enough, you can sue him.
And that’s the best advice I can give.
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