Need help! urgent!!!!

HomeCategory: PregnancyNeed help! urgent!!!!
Conflicted asked 5 years ago

Okay, so I’ll try to keep this brief.

My girlfriend had a major affair about a year ago. It lasted several months and involved a great deal of deception and pain, but in the end we managed to work things out and stayed together… Last April we got amazing news: my girlfriend was pregnant! We had been trying for a couple months, and both of us were absolutely thrilled by the news.

Because of what had happened, I asked her whether or not there was any chance that this baby was not mine. She swore to me that it was impossible; she hadn’t even spoken to her affair since long before she conceived… I knew this was at least a partial lie because I had hard evidence that they were in regular phone contact right up until the moment she found out she was pregnant. But I never imagined she would mislead me about something as significant as paternity. So I believed her.

Now, the baby has been born and he is absolutely amazing. Healthy, adorable… I love him like you wouldn’t believe!!

At first, the question of paternity never entered my mind… but I recently discovered that my partner had been lying to me about a couple other things (details not important), and I realized that I really can’t trust this girl. It got my mind racing again… Is this baby that I love so much really mine??

Looking at a picture of the guy she had an affair with… I see a lot of resemblance. Like a LOT! Or maybe I’m just paranoid, and looking for resemblance.

It’s torturing me. I feel like I need to know the truth. But I just want to be this child’s father so badly.

So now I’m debating a paternity test. Part of me thinks that I’ll NEVER be able to stop wondering and being torn apart by this if I don’t get a real answer. Another part of me is just terrified of finding out that I’m not the father.

I’ve looked into paternity testing… it’s reliable, and I could do it without my gf knowing. Should I do it?  Is it possible that I can be a good father to this baby without knowing the truth? Is it possible that I can stop worrying about this without finding out for sure?

Any thoughts would be GREATLY appreciated!!