8 months pregnant and constantly fighting with absent father. Should I get divorced?

HomeCategory: Pregnancy8 months pregnant and constantly fighting with absent father. Should I get divorced?
Jennyboo asked 3 years ago

In a summary of my situation, I have been married for 6 years together for 7. My husband is from the UK and I’m from the US. We live in the UK where he is from so he could persue his band. We never discussed in detail what exactly we planned for the next 6 years to come but I had faith that I was with someone who would adjust to accommodate my needs as I accommodate his. We fell pregnant right after getting married (which was not the plan) and I waited while pregnant for my visa to come just in the nick of time to move to the UK before the airline wouldn’t sell me a ticket (5 months). I had expressed to him that I feared becoming a lonely depressed tour widow who brings up the kids while partner is on tour living like a bachelor. He promised me this wouldn’t be us. He said that we would travel with him and if we saw this through we would be financially able to have a place in California where I am from and my kids would get all of this amazing experience. I’ll just start with the fact that none of this ever happened. It wasn’t totally unlikely as his band did receive a large break and now after 6 years we are seeing a healthy bank statement to show for it but certainly not for several years. Basically, exactly what I feared when I stood there in my Grandmother’s garden with tears streaming down my face, is exactly how the outcome to my story has unfolded. All these years I have expressed how unhappy I am being alone for so long a periods bringing up a baby with no friends or family support to boot. (My extended family (I have no parents) and friends are not very well off and can only come so often) my whole life has been swallowed up by my husband and what he does for a living. We found out we were pregnant even though I had an IUD put in that should have prevented this and I had an abortion many years ago and will never do it again. I knew he had a massive tour planned that I already wasn’t happy about but now I was devastated. I’ve spent this pregnancy alone and it’s been very unfortunately a hard one. I’m looking after my 5 year old who goes to school on my own and along with a pelvic disorder that has become debilitating I struggle with depression because of the pain and my inability to cope. I finally threatened to leave and move back to where I am from with my kids if he doesn’t make compromises on his side. He is not willing to look into any other line of work but will try and tour a little less. I don’t believe that it will work out that way as I am already close to my due date and he’s gone to the US again because the stand in’s Visa fell through. He has been gone the majority of 5 months and was just home a week and a half saying he wasn’t going to leave anymore to help me but got the news about having to go. I’m hurt because I love him so much and have tried to stick with him but have lost myself and my connection with my loved ones back home while I am sat here in the evenings crying. I can’t see this being the right path in life.