10 Things Men Really Want in a Girlfriend (Shhh – Don’t tell anyone – it’s a secret)

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Image Source: yourtango

Image Source: yourtango

 

So what does actually make the perfect girlfriend anyway? Is she the girl next door with a natural hot look or the one down the hall with double-Ds? Well, maybe neither.

Contrary to what we might think, most guys aren’t actually looking for a supermodel for the long run. They are really looking for one that is their perfect equal – someone who is down-to-earth, kind and sensitive to the needs of others.

Here are 10 traits that men keep in the back of their minds when deciding if a woman (that is, you) sitting across from him on a date is good girlfriend material.

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#1 Is she confident?

There is nothing sexier than a woman who knows who she is. People are typically treated the way they treat themselves. So if you are constantly asking questions, seeking reassurance that you are beautiful, etc., chances are that he will too.

#2 Is she intelligent?

Acting like you are dumb when you are quite sharp is so – well, high school. Wise men don’t seek frivolous women – they are looking for women who are their equal.

#3 Is she materialistic?

Being blessed with something or being given a gift is awesome and amazing in and of itself. Don’t ruin it by demanding nice dinners and the best seats at the ballet. Let him surprise you and enamor you with gifts. There’s nothing worse than an attitude of entitlement – it’s a huge turn-off.

#4 Is she spontaneous?

Routines are awesome in their own right – but sometimes we may lose the spark if we’re not careful. Can she conjure up ideas to keep things going? How flexible is she to a spur-of-the moment plan like lighting a few candles during a pizza dinner or going for a picnic rather than eating at home? It takes two – one to come up with the idea and the other to agree. Can she do both?

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#5 Is she laid-back?

Relaxing with the person you love is oh so very necessary. One needs to know how to have balance and how to recognize that rest is something to be guarded and protected. Will she be able to read you well enough to know when you are tired? And when you are, to help you relax? Is she smart enough to delay bringing up a topic until you are less tired? No one likes to be hounded at the wrong time – ever.

#6 Is she playful?

Men love it when women laugh at their jokes without being mindless or serious all the time. Can she find a way to make light of irritating situations? Can she defuse a situation with humor? When you have totally blown it, does she get on your case or is she supportive and try to make the most of the situation? People who can find the silver lining and remain playful – especially during stressful situations are always keepers.

#7 Is she sensual?

Being confident in one’s sexuality is huge. Does she maintain her sense of who she is around her man? She doesn’t need to be a fantasy model or anything like that – just at ease with who she is around him. He wants a woman who maintains her allure and looks nice. She knows it’s okay to wear sweatpants while cuddling to watch a movie. But to go to a nice restaurant, the LBD is already pressed and ready to go.

#8 Is she honest?

If she cannot be trusted, where is the relationship headed? It is wise to be mindful about on-going communications with boyfriends of the past. Does she keep honest friends? The company that one keeps is often a good indicator of where a person’s true heart and mind lie.

#9 Is she independent?

Independence is key – for both of you. Is she uber clingy and wants to talk or text every few minutes? If so, warning – stay away. Women who are super clingy are likely super insecure as well – thus, it is probable that they are also controlling. A woman who maintains her independence with her own activities, friends, etc. is likely to allow him to maintain his. Both are necessary for a healthy relationship. He needs to go golfing with his buddies. Chances are that she needs space as much as he does – but if she doesn’t give him his space, she’s likely to lose him.

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#10 Is she supportive?

Being supportive without being suffocating is important. Can she recognize when he’s under the gun and needs a helping hand or a quick note of encouragement? Being flexible and keeping a good attitude is important all the way around. It’s never automatic and is something that takes time, but if she has the ability and the two of you can communicate well, you’ll certainly be successful.

Two final hidden questions are, “Can she think about more than just herself?” and “Can you?” If the answer is, “Yes” to both questions, then you are likely well on your way.