Insecurity
One of the biggest faux pas a guy can make that’s going to put women off is displaying insecurity. This could be anything from being nervous, to seeking constant validation, to being suspicious and jealous all the time. Being insecure ranks as one of the biggest turn offs for women everywhere.
Oversensitive guys
Let’s be clear, women do like a bit of sensitivity in their man… but in reasonable doses. What they absolutely do not want is a guy who takes everything to heart, and who becomes offended by things that aren’t about him. These are the guys who can’t get out of their own way. Don’t be that guy!
Being cocky
Okay, so this one is controversial. Women love confidence, and there is a fine line between confidence and cockiness. Humility is your friend in this instance; you can be confident and self-assured, but you need to reign it in with the cockiness, unless you want the ladies to run a mile.
Being overly touchy-feely
A bit of contact is perfectly fine, and this is the kind of thing that will progress naturally if you are attracted to one another. But, the worst thing you can do is to start grabbing girls without their consent, as this is the biggest way to put her off, and be on the receiving end of a slap.
Narcissists
Again, this kind of treads a similar line to the cockiness trait – loving yourself is perfectly okay, but you need to go about it in a socially calibrated way if you want the ladies to respond. This is particularly prudent on dates; if you’re talking about yourself too much it’s a big red flag to the ladies, indicating that you’re a potential narcissist.
Lack of manners
As the saying goes, manners cost nothing, and a lack of manners can actually be a big red flag for a lot of girls. Basic societal norms should not be that hard to follow, and having good manners is pretty much par for the course these days guys – take notes!
Overly keen
Being keen and enthusiastic is good, in fact, it’s great. However, you must never, ever, ever, be too keen, as this is the death knell for any potential romance. Don’t like her too quickly or, if you do, don’t be obvious about it. Slow down and take things a little easier, and you will have a much greater chance of success in the long-run.
White lies
Okay, look… in some cases you may get a pass for white lies, but they are very rare. Typically, if you are lying about something like your job or what you want from the future, this is not okay, and it’s also going to lead to bigger and more difficult lies. Before you know it, you’ve built a house of cards.
Mixed signals
There is nothing women hate more than mixed signals, especially in the early stages of a relationship. They want you to be honest and straightforward as much as possible, and they don’t want mind games. If you like a girl, be upfront with her, and tell her what you want. Leave the mixed signals at the door.
Misogyny
Misogyny is not attractive, and is not something that ladies are going to get on board with. Yes, in very certain circumstances you might get away with a joke, but even then you’re on thin ice. Women are equal to men and should be treated with the same level of respect at all times.
Being close-minded
The world has changed, and people have so many different beliefs and approaches to things nowadays. It takes an open-minded couple to really thrive, and being closed off to things and other points of view is one of the least attractive traits any man (or woman) can have.
Neediness
This is a similar one to the guys who are overly sensitive, these types of men are just exhausting for women. Being needy, texting her all the time or constantly wanting to see her, is going to grow real old, real fast. In fact, this is probably the best way of actually putting her off and driving her away.
Jealousy
Nobody likes a partner who is jealous all the time. Caring deeply about something or someone is not quite the same as being jealous, and a lot of guys confuse the two. You don’t own a woman, and you are not in control of what she does; trust and respect her, or move along.
Ignorance
Being ignorant to the way the world is and to how cultures have changed is going to be a big turn off for a lot of girl. You need to try to keep yourself educated and up to date with politics, trends, pop culture and more in order to be the most attentive guy possible. This is a big turn on, especially if you have similar interests.
Rudeness
Accidental rudeness is something that women can let slide, but blatant rudeness is a big no-no. It doesn’t matter whether you’re being rude to her, the Uber driver, the waiter, or the store clerk, this is a massive red flag. Be polite and kind to everyone, and be understanding of different situations.
Being dismissive
Women have experienced generations of oppression, the last thing they need is some guy dismissing their opinion or viewpoint. Another big red flag is ignoring her concerns about safety – if she says she wants to meet at a restaurant for safety, respect that.
Being a poor listener
Another big turn off for a lot of women is when a guy is a poor listener. This is something that a lot of guys slip up with, there’s a difference between hearing someone and being a good, active listener – which is something that will score you a lot of brownie points with women. It seems basic, but it’s all about showing you’re engaged in the conversation.
Being too aggressive
Women like a guy who takes charge and is dominant, but not a guy who is aggressive, and too many men fail to make this distinction. Being aggressive is inappropriate, unacceptable, and can be terrifying for a lot of women, and this goes double when it comes to trusting relationships.
Going silent
Yes, we live in an age of screens and texting as our key way of communicating, but this doesn’t mean you should go on radio silence for several days. Dropping a girl a message to make sure she knows you might be a little busy over the next few days is polite and courteous.
Sex talk
There are a lot of things that will naturally progress when you are dating, and sex talk is one of them. This is absolutely fine (and natural!), but you need to make sure you don’t do it too soon, or too much. It can make women uncomfortable if unreciprocated, and is one of the absolute biggest turn-offs for any woman in 2023.
Laziness
Everyone has some lazy days, where they take a nap, or feel lethargic, and this is absolutely fine. But, what you really need to avoid doing is making laziness a personality trait. You should be making an effort for the woman in your life and this sometimes means going out of your way for her, even if you don’t particularly want to.
Poor hygiene
This is pretty basic stuff guys, yet too many of you are still getting it wrong. You need to be hygienic, and this means you need to smell good, be well groomed, and have some sort of clear and obvious hygiene regimen that you observe on a regular basis. Taking care of yourself is essential.
Being judgmental
Nobody likes to be judged, and women are no different. Not everybody has the same preferences and this is fine, but resist the urge to comment on your dislikes. In fact, being judgemental toward other women is one of the fastest ways in which you can turn off a girl.
Being selfish
Looking out for yourself is not the same as being selfish, and being selfish is a big no-no for women. Whether it’s in the relationship or in the bedroom, no woman wants to be dealing with a selfish man; this is a collaboration, not a one man show, so make sure you are involving her.
Trash talking your ex
We all come with baggage and we all come with exes. Many of us have had significantly bad breakups. One of the absolute worst things you can do when it comes to your new relationship, though, is to trash talk your ex. This is a big red flag for a lot of girls, and something we suggest you don’t make a habit of.
Trying to be “alpha”
Now, the concept of the “alpha male” is one of the more controversial elements of modern dating. It has led to a lot of guys trying to adopt a persona that they believe falls into this camp, even when it’s considered toxic. This is a massive turn off for a lot of girls, and many would rather you be your real, more sensitive self.
Inconsistency
Blowing hot and cold is infuriating at the best of times, and can be really confusing for a lot of women out there. Inconsistency is not the way to enjoy a balanced and healthy relationship, and this is going to be one of the things that puts women off and eventually drives them away.
Cheating
Infidelity is never an acceptable betrayal in any relationship, but it does happen. However, this is not something you can (or should) expect a woman to forgive you for. Cheating is going to be one of the quickest ways of driving her away for good, and sabotaging your relationship to the point of ruin.
Poor performance in the bedroom
Look, nobody is expecting you work miracles in the sheets, but having a fulfilling sex life is important to a lot of women. Poor performance now and again is fine, but if this becomes a consistent thing, there could be cause for concern, and this might leave your partner unfulfilled.
Boredom
It is said, “You can do anything to a woman except bore her,” and, whilst not the healthiest view, there is some truth to this. Women hate to be bored! Often, they definitely value spontaneity over routine and predictability. So try to make sure you are not boring and that you still attempt to spark some excitement in your relationship.
Showing off
Nobody likes a show-off, but they particularly don’t like it when the person who is showing off is their date for the evening. This means you need to resist the urge to start bragging about how much you earn, how many cars you have, your body-fat content and the rest, in favor of being a bit more humble.
Not making a move
One thing that will drive a woman crazy (and not in a good way) is you not making a move. If you’re on a first date and things are going well, there will likely be signs and opportunities for making your move. If you don’t take them, she’s going to think you don’t want her or you simply aren’t assertive enough.
Taking longer to get ready than her
No woman wants a boyfriend who takes longer to get ready than she does, and this is going to be one of the biggest turn offs for many ladies. Taking care of yourself is great, but a high maintenance man is often incredibly off putting. Whilst some form of beauty routine is important, it needs to be as efficient and low-key as possible.
Double texting
If you’re just starting out messaging a potential date and you’re trying to make your text game stand out against the competition, one of the worst things you can do is double text. It’s seen as a display of neediness, and shows you can’t leave her to text you in her own time.
Being messy
A little bit of messiness is fine, it’s something that’s expected in many relationships, especially as men tend to be messier than women. However, if it starts to get to the point where you are too messy, this can create problems in the relationship, so this is something you need to work on as much as you can.
Not helping with household chores
Housework is something that all couples have to do, but if it is completely one-sided and she is being left to do everything, then it’s going to cause some friction. Being lazy and not helping out around the house is the best way of ensuring you drive any woman away.
Having no ambition
This is not to say that you have to have an amazing career with a six figure salary, but making sure you have at least some ambition is really important. A lack of ambition is one of the biggest turn offs for a woman, particularly these days, so it is important to make sure you have a degree of ambition.
Communication breakdown
Communication is the key to any long-term relationship that is going to enjoy success, and this is something that you will both need to work on as a couple. A breakdown in communication is one of the biggest elements that can put women off when they are dating a guy, and this is why you have to uphold your side in working to improve this.
You’re too controlling
No woman wants to be told where she can and can’t go, who she can and can’t hang out with, and what she can and can’t wear. Being controlling is one of the biggest red flags you can present, and this is something that is going to drive any woman away.
Your future goals are different
One of the biggest reasons a lot of couples split is that they both want different things. One may want kids and marriage, whilst the other may not, and this can lead to friction long term. It’s best to be upfront about this kind of thing before you enter into a relationship.